by Kirby Hasseman
I was struggling.
We all have days like that. We have those days that make us wonder why we do what we do. Does it really matter? Does anyone really care? I don’t think it’s just me. So that day I was having “one of those days.” And then I got this message posted on my Facebook wall.
“Like a lot of people, I’m sure, I listen to podcasts while I’m driving. Yours is one that I listen to. Bailey (my 6 year old) generally hates when I “just listen to people talk”, but, the last few times she’s gotten in the car she’s asked if we can listen to Kirby. When I told her you are a friend of mine that I’ve known for a long time, she instantly declared “I want to be friends with him too”. I’m not sure that 6 year olds are the audience you are aiming for, but we are all fans of yours. ?” Sarah
I can’t tell you how much this brightened my day! But it’s not about me…it’s about you.
Though Sara and her 6 year old Bailey boosted my day, that’s not the point. The point is, we all have the ability to spread that piece of joy.
My rule is simple. If I catch myself saying something nice about someone behind their back…I tell them.
That’s an easy rule that we can all take a moment to follow. So give some thought to that person that helped you this week (or this month).
Make a list. Then take a minute to reach out to them on Facebook, or via text or pick up the phone. It’s very likely that you will lift someone’s day (like Sarah and Bailey did for me). And what’s even cooler is that you will likely lift your own spirits as well!
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by Kirby Hasseman
Whenever I find myself stressed and overwhelmed, worried and afraid, the chances are I am not “living in the IS.”
I was reminded of this today when I woke up before the alarm with my head filled with the huge projects on my “to do” list. I need to live in the “is.” Let me explain.
Living in the WAS
Have you ever heard a person that is constantly bemoaning the fact that things are changing? They constantly tell you how good things “used to be.” They can only see the bad in what is coming…and never the progress. These people are living in the WAS. This glorification of the past makes me sad for these folks. As Billy Joel said “The good old days weren’t always good, and tomorrow ain’t as bad as it seems.” Living in the WAS will create frustration and anger. It also fills your heart with regret. As much as you want to, you can’t turn back time. So stop trying.
Living in the WILL BE
The other source of stress comes from living in the “WILL BE.” As you know, I am a big believer in goals. As Jeff Haden says, when it comes to goals you need to “set it and forget it.” Many of us are constantly worried about what our clients will say, what our friends will think, what society will do. But all of those worries are complete fabrications! You (and I) are debilitated by stress and worry about an event that has not (and might not ever) happened.
Living in the IS
Living in the IS reminds you to be centered and present in this present moment. You only get this moment (and this life) once. What are you doing with it…right now? Are you working on projects that matter to you? What are you doing to create memories? Are you being intentional? In addition, living in the IS gives you perspective and happiness. It is the only “real world” we have. The past is a memory. The future is a fabrication. Living in the IS gives you a chance to “be here.” Right now. Take a deep breath. Live in the IS.
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by Kirby Hasseman
You probably hear it from someone every week. “TGIF! Thank God It’s Friday.”
It seems we have an entire culture full of people that are “living for the weekend.” And though I understand that every one needs leisure time, for the most part this is nuts. As Gary Vaynerchuk says, “If you are living for the weekend, your shit is broken.”
Why? Because my whole goal in life is to be chasing something that excites me. If that’s the case, I need (and want) to be doing it all the time. I am not upset on Monday. I am excited to get after it.
That being said, I love Fridays too! Here are my reasons I say “TGIF.”
1. Everyone Else Is In A Good Mood
That’s right. One of the reasons I love Fridays is because you love Fridays. It means that you (and most of the people I know) are in a better mood. This makes every interaction more fun and productive. I am just like everyone else. If everyone around me is lighter, then I will be too! (Oh, and happy people are more successful, I talk about that here).
2. People Make Decisions
I find that a lot of work gets done before you go on vacation. Why? Because there is a deadline. The same is true, in my experience, on Fridays. The decision they have been putting off all week gets made on Friday. It’s like a mental deadline. They want to get it off their desk so they can leave the office with a clear conscience. That means Fridays are a great day to pick up the phone in sales.
3. Measuring the Weeks Results
In a sales and entrepreneurial world, we are chasing results, right? Much of the time, we measure those based on what happens Monday through Friday. So how have I done? How far have I come? What did I accomplish? I measure these on Friday. I love that. Either I have done what I had hoped…or not. Then that provides me the carrot or the stick to start again next week.
So there you have it. These are 3 reasons that I say “TGIF.” How about you? What is your favorite thing about Friday?
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by Kirby Hasseman
My youngest daughter Jade is getting ready to start her Senior Year. As a parent, this is an exciting, bittersweet, scary, fun and surreal time.
Yes. All of those. As many of you know, it’s also the time when you have to start talking about “what’s next.” With that in mind, there are the obligatory college visits, discussions about the future, and the ACT test. This is the test, of course, that helps colleges and universities decide whether your kid is good enough to pay for the opportunity to attend their school. If you think you detect a hint of negativity about the process, you are right.
Unfortunately, on the first time out, Jade felt the same way.
She was not sure what she wanted to do. She did NOT want to take this test. She did not want to get up early. She was pretty much “all out” on the whole process. Her results showed it. She did not do well on the test. But as is nearly always the case, the failure is not nearly as important as the response to it. Jade went back to work.
First, she adopted a better attitude about the whole process. That is SO important. Studies tell you that when you have a positive attitude, your brain functions better. So that alone might have helped. But that was not all. She also started working with a coach. Elaine Smith worked with her over 5 sessions. Not only did she give Jade tips and tricks for attacking the test, but (maybe more importantly) she gave her the confidence that she could do well.
She studied. She worked on it . She had a better attitude. Her results showed it.
I am very proud to report that Jade’s overall score went up quite a bit. Several sections of the test went up even more. It’s great news. But to me, this is not the best part of the story. The reality (as I see it) is that this is just one standardized test. It’s one of those things that seems important in the moment. But it’s not. Not really.
What IS important is that Jade learned how life works. When you try something new, you might do poorly. You almost certainly will do poorly if your attitude sucks. But if you learn from it. You readjust your attitude. You work on it. You get a coach. You will get better. Now THAT is a lesson I can get behind.
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by Kirby Hasseman
Kindness is a super power.
Don’t get me wrong. I love all of the Super Hero movies. I love the idea that “someone” with infinite power can save me (and the rest of humanity) if things go terribly wrong. It’s fun. It’s entertaining. The problem with these movies is they help create the idea that we need someone else to be “the hero” of the story.
We don’t.
We have the ability to be a hero each day. We just have to choose to put on the cape. And here’s the thing. It’s not hard. Unlike in the movies, we don’t need to lift cars, dodge bullets, fly or bend the universe with our minds. Making a difference in your every day life is really easy. You just have to be intentional. Here are just a few simple ways to be a super hero.
Give Credit
People are doing interesting and important work every day…in every community. Make sure they get credit for the work. More importantly, give credit for the effort. It’s the effort (not always the results) that they can duplicate.
Give Compliments
Be on the lookout to give compliments. Do you like the color of their shirt? Tell them. Did they get a new hairstyle? Tell them it looks nice. Maybe you appreciate their sense of humor at the office. Don’t keep it a secret. One of my rules of life is, if I catch myself saying something nice about someone “behind their back,” I let them know.
Give Thanks
It’s simple. But it’s amazing how often it doesn’t happen. Make sure you give thanks to your customers. Make sure you appreciate your family and your team. Give thanks to the people that help make your life better…they might just continue it! 🙂
Smile
If you want people to think you are a nice person, smiling at them is the easiest way to make it happen. It costs nothing, but it makes everyone feel acknowledged and appreciated it. And the thing is, most people don’t take the time. So you stand out as well.
Remember: Everyone has the ability to be a Super Hero. You just have to be willing to put on the cape.
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by Kirby Hasseman
We all have days when we wake up feeling stuck. I do too. I wake up lacking the motivation to do nearly anything, let alone the important work that is often taxing and hard. So what do I do when that happens? I spent 10 minutes talking about a few tactics on a recent DMJ Podcast here. But one of the tactics I use is to push “good into my brain” first thing in the morning. I have a few “go to” places that provide me inspiration…and help to remind me to get after it. Here are a few I use…feel free to steal them!
6 Places I Find Inspiration
Seth Godin’s Blog: I don’t view Seth’s blog as “motivational” exactly. But it is a blog that shows up (every single day) and makes me think. I love that. And in making me think, it inspires me to be better. His blog is here.
Gary Vaynerchuk’s Daily Vee: There is no way I watch every Daily Vee. Gary produces so much content, I don’t know how (if you are grinding too) you could consume it all. BUT, it seems like when I do, he says something that reminds me or inspires me. His Youtube channel is here.
Casey Neistat’s Vlog: I love Casey’s shooting and editing style in his videos. So while many of them are not “inspirational” by nature, they do show me what I want to create. And Casey has a personality that is fun and charming too! Here is one of his latest videos…fun.
Jeff Haden articles: Jeff is one of my favorite writers on the interwebs. Apparently I am not alone because he is one of the top read writers on Inc.com and Linkedin. He also recently wrote the book called Motivation Myth which I really enjoyed. As a matter of fact I featured it on a recent article and podcast about the books I recommend here.
Grant Cardone: Grant can be a little over the top for me. But when I need a boost or a kick in the pants, he can be rocket fuel. If you are aspirational in your goal setting, Cardone can help you think bigger. Here is his Youtube channel.
John Lee Dumas: I have talked about being unreasonable before (here)…and JLD was definitely that. John Lee Dumas created Entrepreneur On Fire and interviewed a different entrepreneur on a podcast EVERY day. It’s impressive and he created a ton of valuable content. His website is here.
Speaking of inspiration…I loved this graphic and it originally showed up here: https://ukessay.com/. Thanks so much!
So these are just a few of the voices I go to in order to get me going. There are countless others that include books, podcasts, blogs and more. What are your sources of inspiration? Let me know! Oh..and if this blog is providing you some inspiration and value, subscribe to our VIP newsletter here!
