Kindness is a Super Power

kindness is a superpower

Kindness is a super power.

Don’t get me wrong.  I love all of the Super Hero movies.  I love the idea that “someone” with infinite power can save me (and the rest of humanity) if things go terribly wrong.  It’s fun.  It’s entertaining.   The problem with these movies is they help create the idea that we need someone else to be “the hero” of the story.

We don’t.

We have the ability to be a hero each day.  We just have to choose to put on the cape.  And here’s the thing.  It’s not hard.  Unlike in the movies, we don’t need to lift cars, dodge bullets, fly or bend the universe with our minds.  Making a difference in your every day life is really easy.  You just have to be intentional.   Here are just a few simple ways to be a super hero.

Give Credit

People are doing interesting and important work every day…in every community.  Make sure they get credit for the work.  More importantly, give credit for the effort.  It’s the effort (not always the results) that they can duplicate.

Give Compliments

Be on the lookout to give compliments.  Do you like the color of their shirt?  Tell them.  Did they get a new hairstyle?  Tell them it looks nice.  Maybe you appreciate their sense of humor at the office.  Don’t keep it a secret.  One of my rules of life is, if I catch myself saying something nice about someone “behind their back,” I let them know.

Give Thanks

It’s simple.  But it’s amazing how often it doesn’t happen.  Make sure you give thanks to your customers.  Make sure you appreciate your family and your team.  Give thanks to the people that help make your life better…they might just continue it!  🙂

Smile

If you want people to think you are a nice person, smiling at them is the easiest way to make it happen.  It costs nothing, but it makes everyone feel acknowledged and appreciated it.   And the thing is, most people don’t take the time.  So you stand out as well.

Remember:  Everyone has the ability to be a Super Hero.  You just have to be willing to put on the cape.

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Where I Find Inspiration

where kirby hasseman finds inspiration

We all have days when we wake up feeling stuck.  I do too.  I wake up lacking the motivation to do nearly anything, let alone the important work that is often taxing and hard.  So what do I do when that happens?  I spent 10 minutes talking about a few tactics on a recent DMJ Podcast here.   But one of the tactics I use is to push “good into my brain” first thing in the morning.  I have a few “go to” places that provide me inspiration…and help to remind me to get after it.  Here are a few I use…feel free to steal them!

6 Places I Find Inspiration

 Seth Godin’s Blog:  I don’t view Seth’s blog as “motivational” exactly.  But it is a blog that shows up (every single day) and makes me think.  I love that.  And in making me think, it inspires me to be better.  His blog is here. 

Gary Vaynerchuk’s Daily Vee:  There is no way I watch every Daily Vee.  Gary produces so much content, I don’t know how (if you are grinding too) you could consume it all.  BUT, it seems like when I do, he says something that reminds me or inspires me.  His Youtube channel is here. 

Casey Neistat’s Vlog:  I love Casey’s shooting and editing style in his videos.  So while many of them are not “inspirational” by nature, they do show me what I want to create.  And Casey has a personality that is fun and charming too!  Here is one of his latest videos…fun.   

Jeff Haden articles:  Jeff is one of my favorite writers on the interwebs.  Apparently I am not alone because he is one of the top read writers on Inc.com and Linkedin.  He also recently wrote the book called Motivation Myth which I really enjoyed.  As a matter of fact I featured it on a recent article and podcast about the books I recommend here.   

Grant Cardone:  Grant can be a little over the top for me.  But when I need a boost or a kick in the pants, he can be rocket fuel.  If you are aspirational in your goal setting, Cardone can help you think bigger.  Here is his Youtube channel. 

John Lee Dumas:  I have talked about being unreasonable before (here)and JLD was definitely that.  John Lee Dumas created Entrepreneur On Fire and interviewed a different entrepreneur on a podcast EVERY day.  It’s impressive and he created a ton of valuable content.  His website is here. 

Speaking of inspiration…I loved this graphic and it originally showed up here:  https://ukessay.com/.  Thanks so much!

So these are just a few of the voices I go to in order to get me going.  There are countless others that include books, podcasts, blogs and more.  What are your sources of inspiration? Let me know! Oh..and if this blog is providing you some inspiration and value, subscribe to our VIP newsletter here!      

Solve For Happy

solve for happy

I just recently finished the book Solve For Happy.  It’s an “engineer’s take” on the subject of being happy…and I really found it fascinating.

The author, Mo Gawdat, is the Chief Business Officer at Google X and the book was thoughtful, emotional (Mo lost his son), long, spiritual and more.  You can find the book here. I listened to the audiobook, and it was a longer one.  Mo dives deeply into topics, so I found it worth the time.  But for those who want a quick snapshot, here are a few takeaways I found from the book.

You Are Not Your Thoughts 

I found this interesting because I have been talking and writing about this a lot.  “We all have that voice” that prattles on in our head.  It tells us we are not good enough.  It yells about danger and how everything will not work out.  It’s often mean and mostly negative.  Mo tells us that this voice is not you…and how to take a step back and listen to it less…so you can be more happy. One of my favorite concepts in the book involves Mo talking to his brain, “No.  That is not a good thought.  Go and bring me a better thought.”  Love that.

Negative Emotions Are Not in the Present

Gawdat spent a great deal of time outlining all kinds of emotions and how they can affect our happiness.  Then he pointed out the negative emotions.  What do they have in common?  Nearly all of them are rooted in the future or the past!  This was a bit of an “aha” for me.  If you are angry about being passed over for a promotion, that is rooted in the past.  Worried about an upcoming meeting?  That’s in the future. And since the past is done, and the future is just our imagination, the things that are making us unhappy are just our own thoughts.  Powerful.

Live in the Present

We need to get back to “living in the present.”  That is when we are most happy, content and (dare I say) joyful.  Mo says that when he finds himself getting swept away with negative emotions he does a simple exercise.  He closes his eyes.  Then he opens them and closes them again.  Then he describes what is in front of him…in detail.  It brings him back to the here and now. This was a detailed book and he covers a LOT more than this.  But those are just a few concepts that jumped out to me.

He even talks about how to overcome our fear of death and gives his take on what comes “after.”  As I said, it’s a lot…but I enjoyed it.  You can find the book on Amazon here.  

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Let The People See You

see the people in sales

It turns out my first sales manager was half right.  When I first got in sales, I was told “When in doubt, go and see the people.”  It was an over-simplification, of course.  On the other hand, it’s always seemed to work for me.  When I was waiting for the phone to ring or waiting for the sales to come in, I hear that voice.   “Go and see the people.”

In Jonah Berger’s book “Invisible Influence” I am starting to learn why this works.  In multiple studies, Berger explains that familiarity and having the “people see you” works. In one study, pictures of female students were judged on their level of attractiveness.  (Cringe all you want, it was the study).  It turns out that if the female students were seen in the class, they were judged to be more attractive.   Other studies showed that “being seen” more often could make your more likable and trustworthy.

From my perspective this brings powerful insights into the world of sales, brand building and more!  So here are a few takeaways…

See the People 

Though the script has flipped a bit, the adage still holds water.  When you are feeling reactive in your business, get out of your office and go “let the people see you.”  And if you can add value in some way (or just to say thanks like this post suggests), even better.

Social Media 

This is one of the reason great social media works.  We are giving people a chance to “see us” on a regular basis.  Some people would say this can be overdone.  Maybe.  But the science from this book suggests otherwise.

Consistency is Key 

This is also a bit of science to back up my belief in consistency.  Whether we are talking about social media, content marketing or sales, you need to be consistent in your efforts.  We all have that voice in our heads that tells us we need to stop...it’s too much.  But we need to push through that and continue to “show up” with your prospects and clients.   Let them “see you” over and over again. Make sure never miss the opportunity to “see us!”

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Want to be exceptional? Be unreasonable.

If you want to be exceptional be unreasonable

What do these three have in common?

Each of them are leading voices in their respective spaces and professions.  Here is a super quick background on each.

Gary Vaynerchuk grew his family’s wine business from $3 Million to $60 Million before leaving to start Vaynermedia, a leading digital agency in the world.  He is a best selling author and sought after speaker.  Gary began his journey by creating a wine show on YouTube and created over 1000 episodes of Wine Library TV.  Now he has a team of people that follow him around and create the “Daily Vee.”

Casey Neistat is a filmmaker and world-class vlogger.  Casey has pioneered how many view vlogging and has over 9 million YouTube subscribers.  (That’s about the same as Jimmy Fallon if you were counting).  Casey grew this amazing following by creating a daily, high quality vlog series that highlighted his adventures and his life.

Seth Godin is one of the pioneers of modern marketing.  He is a best selling author many times over and is one of the minds that introduced us to “permission marketing.”  Seth grew an amazing audience by writing a blog each and every day…for years.  Each and every day, Seth “shows up” to share his thoughts on marketing, business and more.

These three are people I admire in business today.

They are the top of their game.  And each of them, in their own way, push me to work harder and do more.  Each of them is totally unreasonable…and that is why they have succeeded. Every time I start to create a goal to raise the exposure of my personal brand or my business, I start with a big idea.  I think of a goal that gets me excited or fired up.  I think “why not?”  That could be me!  And I even start to think of the possibility of what might happen if I head down the path.  And then I think, “ Maybe I should be more reasonable.”  I start to create the internal debate that goes like this… “You have a lot going on.  You have a family and you want to have some time off!  You know you need to think about your quality of life.  You need to be more reasonable.”

And that, my friends, is where exceptional goes to die.  It’s the reason I am excited about creating content every day.  It’s exciting.  It’s scary.  It’s even kind of fun.  But it’s not reasonable! If you want to be exceptional, you need to be unreasonable.

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Listening to “That Voice”

listening to that voice

 Whether you want to create a blog post or a company, a video or a presentation, we all have to overcome the same thing.  “That voice.”

It’s the voice that is in each of our head that tells us that we are “not good enough,” or “not smart enough,” or that “no one will care.”  We all have to hear that inner voice that asks “why would anyone care what you have to say?”  Or even the one that tells us “this will make you look stupid.”

In addition, I think we look at people who regularly put out content, or start businesses, or speak in public and think “they must not have that voice.”  They must be so confident.  They are not insecure.  It must be easy for them.

Here is a good news/bad news moment.  They have that voice too.  We all have that voice.  (Actually here is an awesome podcast about Bill Petrie-amazing content creator-who says the same thing).  

My hope is this is good news for you.  If you are thinking of putting yourself out there, you are not alone.  We all have that voice to overcome.  Every time I post a blog, or a video, or get ready to make a sales call, I have the voice that tells me I am about to make a mistake.  But here’s the thing…I do it anyway.  And you can too.

Yes there are times that a blog post will have a typo (at least mine do).  There will likely be a time that a sales prospect will be a jerk.  And it’s certainly possible that you will try something and it will not work.  But if you keep showing up, you can and will get better.  But in order to get better…to overcome the voice…you have to act.  You have to create.

I would love to tell you that if you continue to do this you will silence the voice.  But you won’t.  It will always be there.  But you have a cool story to tell.  You have something unique to give.  No one else can give it for you.  You just have to overcome the voice.

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